Lost in Translation

So here's the scoop.  Our dossier is STILL being translated.  Yep, apparently a month is just not long enough.  So there will be some more waiting.  BUT....our agency decided to give us a bit of new information to keep us happy while we wait....and it worked.  We are rather easy to please at this point....any info will do.
They sent us Olivia's medical/psychological evaluation.  I know this doesn't sound like an exciting read but it was...it really, really was. 

We now know that although she was born premature she is on target for her size.  She is only 2 inches shorter than Orrin. 

 

She is walking, climbing and playing like a normal toddler. 

 

She knows her name and responds (this may pose a problem considering her real name is not Olivia). 

 

She does have a few health issues we will need to deal with when she comes home. Nothing too severe, though.

 

We now know which city she is located in and the picture on the left of my header is an actual photo of the town she lives in. 

 

 

There was this one line near the bottom of her evaluation that caught my eye.

 

"In the present situation _______ most of all lacks constant, individual contact with close to her caregivers. The girl would feel best in a home that can provide her with love, care and natural stimulation, which consists of various experiences and developmental stimuli. These factors can significantly impact ________ independent functioning as an adult."

 

Oh, yeah! That's us!  Now if they would find a little bit of urgency...I wouldn't mind.



 

No News ( is hopefully good news)... Right?

So I have no news!  Our dossier is still out there somewhere getting translated and whatever else it is that they need to do to it. Time is just dragging and dragging and...oh right, you get the point.
 
But before I begin to bring all of you down, I will tell you a little of the crazy things I have been doing around here.  I know you probably wouldn't call it nesting....but it is something to that effect.  I am doing weird and crazy prep work around here.

#1 - I turned my laundry room into a family closet.  Yep, it is wonderful.  No more folded laundry on the couch for days on end.  No more vomiting closet (you know, where your kids just yank clothes out and stuff clothes in).  No more rewashing clothes because the kids didn't want to put them away, so they stuffed them in the hamper.  This really has made my life so much easier.

No, it is not beautiful, but it is very functional.

#2 - I keep rearranging my kitchen.  Still haven't made it any easier to clean, but it just makes me feel better to do it.

#3 - Still working on the girls room.  I know I said I would put up pictures, and I will.  Unfortunately, just like all my other painting projects, I have run into the problem of having to repaint because I can not get a proper match of existing paint.

#4 - Yard work, yard work, yard work...it never ends.  I did get my husband to finally replace our back steps.  After 8 years of those nasty, rickety trailer steps, I now have a very sturdy (albeit ugly) metal back porch.  No more falling down the back steps because I couldn't quite get over the pile up of snow/ice or because my kids randomly set a paint can in a place I couldn't see it.  And I even have enough room to set my chicken poo shoes outside!  Hurray!

See, it is ugly! (the other one was uglier - yes, that is possible)  Going to have to whip out the old spray paint.  Oh, and if I lived anywhere else I would not have my chickens in my back yard.  This is called "making do". They are lovely ladies, though!

#5 - I keep purging closets, cabinets, and underneath beds.  I can not believe how much stuff I have crammed in this little house!  I really need to have a yard sale...unfortunately I live in Luna (the town on 199 people). So I guess I will just have to make another trip to the thrift store.

#6 - Oh and don't forget the oven cleaning.  Uck!  I don't even want to talk about that.

So there you have it.  That is what I do to pass this rather frustrating silence.  Hopefully, we will hear something soon.  And until we do, you get to listen to the pretty background music "Be Thou My Vision" (one of my favorite hymns) and read about all the weird stuff I do to keep me from going crazy!    I will say this...nesting (or whatever you wanna call it) is way easier without an extra 30 or so pounds nestled tightly between my ribs and hip bones. 

Psalm 55:22

Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.

Perceptions

So we are still in the "waiting" phase of the adoption.  Sometimes I feel like this is much easier than the "paperwork" phase.  I guess no matter how easy or hard, both are a fact of adoption and they are learning experiences.
 
The other day at church a friend (gonna call her "A", so I don't confuse you), said to me, that she thought I was taking this waiting phase so well; if she had been the one waiting she would go crazy.  In fact "A" said that even waiting for our adoption was driving her crazy.  I just laughed; because it reminded me of another conversation I had with my sister a few days before.  Holly had mentioned that "A" (yep, same person--hence the reason it was so funny) had stopped by and had been talking about a big change in her life. Holly mentioned to "A" that she was taking it so well; Holly felt she would have handled this change much worse.  "A" just laughed. 

So what am I getting at?  Perception.  I find it a wonderful thing that people often overlook who we think we are.  And even when they don't, we have an awesome God who does.  He looks at all our personality flaws, attitudes, fears and He sees...Christ!  Yep, He sees Christ covering all those things we think we are hiding.

I watched a video today that a friend recommended about perception.  It was made by Dove (soap).  A police sketch artists brought in a lady and drew her based on only her description of herself and then he brought in someone who knew the lady and drew the  lady based on the other person's description. The results were absolutely amazing --the drawings looked nothing alike. The lady realized that the harsh view of herself was just a hindrance. So often we don't want to be who we really are --whether it be personality or looks or whatever. Aren't you glad God is gracious with us.  He uses with us despite our perceptions of our self.

I know that when I first started wondering whether I could really adopt a little girl with Down Syndrome my perceptions were really off.  I was looking at myself through my eyes. (Weird, right?...I know, this begs the question "whose eyes am I supposed to be looking through?"  Well, I really feel we should look through God's....Still sound off? Here's what I am talking about.)

I saw a mom with 5 kids whose house is generally a complete disaster, who always feels over commited and races to get to said commitments on time (ps. I live in the middle of nowhere and have no idea what "over commitment" is), who doesn't make a meal unless it can be planned and on the table in less that 45 minutes - God saw a mom. (Bet you didn't know that an orphan isn't looking for a super hero - they are just looking for a parent. Yep, it's true.)

I saw a person with little experience with down syndrome - God saw a person that if they relied on Him (Matthew 19:26) could learn.

I saw a person who hated paperwork, talking on the phone, and just basically talking to strangers (yep, I am that girl) - God saw someone who needed to learn that sometimes the hard things are the most rewarding.

I saw someone who had very little patience - God saw someone who really needed to work on that area and found the best possible way to teach her how ...adoption.

I saw a person who wasn't really sure she was tough enough to handle all the judgements and ..."you already have 5 kids, why would you want to adopt"; "down syndrome?...why would you adopt a child like that?"; "why are you adopting from another country?" - and to this, God said to me....

2 Corinthians 12:9
And He said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for My strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in My infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon Me.

 

See it's not about us and who we think we are!  It's about daily letting go of who we think we are and letting Him make us into who He wants us to be.  

 

PS. I will leave you with some pics of us just being who we are...the crazy Johnsons.

 

Dossier Sent

Finally our work is done!  Ok, not completely...

 

  Where to begin? 

It has taken a month to get all of our apostilles sent in, sent back, corrected, redone, resent, notarized, renotarized....ugh. 

But none-the-less, I sent off our dossier to our adoption agency yesterday.  It happens to be missing one piece of apostilled paper, but I am hoping it will show up in the mail today and I can forward it on as well.  ( If you ever plan on adopting, pray that you have no paperwork that will be need to be sent to Texas; they are by far the slowest state I have ever dealt with.)

 

So what is a dossier, anyway?

Shall I list it for you?

 Copies of Birth certificates, marriage certificate, passport pics, family pics, homestudy, I-797 approval, deed or title to house, bank records, statement for adoption, doctor clearances, child abuse clearances....etc. 

Sounds like fun, right?  Not so much!  But we know in the end this will be worth it all.  Just trying to keep focused and yet not focusing too much, has been a really hard task. I have had a hard time knowing when to push people to get something done and when to back off and let everything work itself out. 

 

Now that I have bored you with the paperwork side of adopting shall I tell you the fun part.  Ok, well it is the fun part for me.  I started working on the girls room (just love using the word "girls"--never thought I would get to say that I have "girls").  I am not done yet but maybe I can give you one pic to prove that I am indeed accomplishing something around here.

See!!!  I did something.  I had to do a little cropping on this photo so you would not see the unfinished trim and such.  Does anyone else save leftover paint and then when you go to use it, it is ruined? You go back to the store and they no longer carry that color and can't match to the lid?  This is the story of my painting life...over and over!!!   Anyway, I will show you more of their room later. This will give me something to post about while we are in the "waiting on Poland phase" (which might take a while).

 

 

Depraved Indifference

Depraved Indifference - Eric Ludy

 

 

Run Down

Now  you could take this post title two different ways...either
A. I am about to give you a list of what has been going on here.... or
B. I am " run down"...or
C. both

Unfortunately option "c" best describes my week.  So here's the "run down"....

Monday our I-797 arrived in the mail (FINALLY)...so I needed to get all our paperwork in order and fax it to our agency for them to look over.  I also had to call our homestudy agency and have them send us our clearances.

Tuesday after lunch I ran to the county courthouse to notarize clearances and a few other papers.  Before I went, I decided to check with the Secretary of State to see when I could go up to apostille my papers.  She said I could only have them done Wednesday morning by 8:30.  So I ran home, packed, and loaded my kids in the car.  We made the 1 1/2 drive to my sister's house so the kids could stay with their Uncle Steve while Aunt Holly helped me drive the next four hours to Albuquerque. (I fall asleep at the wheel way too easy, so going by myself was not an option.) We also picked up my mom on the way.  Apparently we have not had a girl's night out since my niece was a toddler and my mom was in chemo the first time (so roughly 13 years ago).  It was about time to escape. ;)

Wednesday we left Albuquerque and drove to Santa Fe.  Santa Fe is not a fun city to drive in...way too many one way streets.  And then we zoomed (ok, my mom does not zoom, but we slowly zoomed) through the capitol building looking for the Secretary of States office.  Once found, I was informed that they would only apostille about 2/3's of my documents.  (Apparently the adoption agency failed to mention that I would have to mail all the other paperwork to the states they originated from.)  Holly, Mom, and I also squeezed a mini shopping trip in there too.

Thursday I spent most of the day figuring out where my paperwork needed to go.  So I filled out forms and wrote checks for the rest of the paperwork. Oh and we fit birthday cupcakes and presents in...for my littlest guy!  He's two now!

Why do they have to grow up?

 

Friday I gathered up all my paperwork and headed to the county courthouse again to notarize one more piece of paper and then buy envelopes for all the documents that needed mailed. I decided that Micah, Noel, and Matt needed to do school since they missed wednesday, so they stayed home; I took Orrin and Matt with me.  About ten minutes in to being at the courthouse, I realized that I should have had all my kids with me, because Micah was supposed to be at a 4-H shooting practice, so I raced home and got the kids and drove back to town. When I pulled up at the shooting range everyone was sitting there waiting for me.  Embarrassing --I hate being late!!!  So I again dropped off  Micah and ran back in to town to mail my documents and buy a picnic lunch for the kids.  After the 4-H shoot was over, I drove the kids to the Tularosa River to play in the water and they promtly forgot all of my wild and crazy antics for the day.

 

And now I sit here in a vegetative state hoping that next week will not be like this week.  I hope we can get all our paperwork back easily and I can send off our Dossier to the adoption agency.  But you just never know... oh, and speaking of vegetative, apparently Orrin's week was just as hard as mine...

Turning two is aweful hard on a kid. 

 I hope my post isn't as boring for you as it was for him. :)

 

What's next?

Today was one of those days that you get all excited about something only to be brought back to harsh reality.  Yes, today I went to my mailbox and found our Immigration Approval ...the one I spent every day last week driving over the the post office to see if it had arrived. (No, I never learn.) 

And I was so excited that I emailed our agency and asked her "what's next?". Now let me warn you.  When adopting, if you have just  passed a huge milestone, never ask what's next!!!! Never! Because it is much more fun to bask in a victory than to wallow in a letdown. Why do I say this? Well, of course, because my case worker answered my question honestly....

She listed all the things that have to happen before we go see our little girl (apostille, dossier, translation, referral, applications) ...and sadly that involved long periods of just WAITING!  Am I good at waiting? Uh no!  

So tonight I sat down and decided that I again needed to revisit some verses on patience (apparently all my past lessons have been forgotten).

 

  Romans 8:25

But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it.

James 1:3

Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.

James 1:4

But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.

 

Yes, I needed these.

So I am going to take the next couple of days to prepare our Dossier for sending off to Olivia's country and then I am going memorize these verses.

 

And to those of you who are wondering....yes, adoption is alot like pregnancy (minus the stretch marks).  Right now I feel like I am 9 months pregnant and my doctor just said "Yeah, I am thinking this baby just needs some more time....I'm thinking about two more months should be good."